Desperate Times and Two Hungry Men

Uncategorized Posted Dec 17, 2007 by metropolis

As you know if you live in New England, or probably saw on the news even if you live outside of the region, last Thursday a brief but formidable snowstorm created epic traffic snarls in and around Boston. Commutes of 6+ hours were common.

After leaving the office at 2:00 pm, only for it to become apparent I wasn’t going to be arriving home any time soon, I ended up making my way back to CHEN PR’s Waltham offices, where I waited with my colleague Brad until 10:00 pm to let the traffic ease before heading home.

It’s amazing how you make decisions in certain circumstances that you wouldn’t conceive of in others. I felt obliged to send the following post to my co-workers regarding one such decision.



While many of you sat out last week’s epic storm on various highways and byways, 5:00 pm last Thursday found Brad and me nestled within the confines of our offices here at 1601 Trapelo Rd.

Now those of you who know Brad and me know that one thing we have in common is a near religious devotion to the “five square meals a day, plus snacks” guide to daily eating.

So when our stomachs began to rumble at 6 pm (pizza delivery, alas, not being a realistic option as a glance out the window revealed cars skating along 128 at various angles of misdirection), we were forced to raid our office kitchen. Our looting included, but was not limited to, the following, to the owners of which Brad and I would like to extend our apologies (but not, in all honesty, our regret):

  • One (1) Lean Cuisine frozen entrée (again, if you know Brad and me, our consumption of Lean Cuisine anything will underscore the perilous situation in which we found ourselves)
  • An unspecified quantity of Harpoon IPA
  • 1 ½ (we do have our limits even in dire straits, and these are disgusting) hard iced teas
  • The remaining champagne from Thursday’s raucous office celebration (I will tell you that it was consumed directly from the bottle, but I won’t tell you by which of us)
  • The remaining cold pizza that accompanied the champagne
  • ½ jar strawberry preserves
  • ½ jar peanut butter
  • Many pieces of bread from various residual loaves
  • Several rice krispie treats
  • Most of the popcorn in the tin
  • 1/3 cheese stick (until Brad noticed a disconcerting brownish color on the other 2/3)

So again, we offer our hearty apologies to the owners of the above. But we ask you to consider the choice that was forced upon Brad and me: eat your food or eat each other.